According to comments made during an awkward Fox 13 News interview, Tiger forward Angel Garcia will stay at Memphis instead of transferring to the commonwealth, sitting out a year, and being further away from the Plush Club.
-The Pistolier
After seeing the following video, I move to dub him Andre the Garcia.
-JB
After the press conference, Taggart confirmed that he will test the NBA waters. He said that Pastner's hire makes it easier to return to Memphis if he does not make the jump to the NBA.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
An Impromptu Elevator Interview
Being the Tomb’s only on-campus source, I look for certain situations where I can put my tuition to good use and bring the front line report.
Nice work, JHob. The fact that you got out of that elevator with all your appendages intact is a victory. It's a pretty good sign that PHN speaks favorably of Pert Plus.
-JB
Monday, April 6, 2009
Josh 'Pert Plus' Pastner
Holla 'atcha boy! We have found us a coach!
Hot dang! ...Now, who is he?
Well for starters, he is Josh PASTNER, not Pasner as some news outlets and internet sites had. He is 31 years of age and was previously an assistant coach for the Tigers under John "Bluegrass" Calipari. Prior to his arrival at Memphis, he spent six years as an assistant coach under the legendary Lute Olsen at the University of Arizona, where he also played. Yeah, that's tenure under a pretty dang good ball coach and a pretty dang good used car salesman and hair stylist. He is a prolific recruiter; handling the majority of the recruiting duties at UofA and UofM and recently being named as the 7th ranked "high-major recruiter" in the country.
The only knock on Pastner, he has no head coaching experience at the college level. It's all good tho, according to DailyWildcat.com, Pastner was the head coach of the "nationally-famous" Houston Hoops AAU program... AT THE AGE OF 16! And guess who played for him... Emeka Okafor. THIS GUY COACHED EMEKA OKAFOR AT AGE 16! He is a excellent big man coach, having coached Luke Walton and Channing Frye at Arizona. Just imagine what he could have done with Joey Dorsey! And maybe, just maybe, he can talk Tag into staying. And maybe, just maybe, just maybe, current former-recruit DeMarcus Cousins will recognize his talent as a big man instructor and remain committed to Memphis. And maybe he can keep some of our assistant coaches here as well. Pastner is also expected to approach Carl Henry, father of current Tiger CJ and former Tiger signee Xavier, to serve on his staff. All of this would certainly leave the the "Big Blue" with some big ol' blue balls.
Let us now speak of retention. Pastner loves Arizona. He is quoted in the same DailyWildcat.com article as saying "I would love to come back here one day, but even if it's not coming back here in basketball terms, coming back here in the community. Tucson is my home." We could be setting ourselves up for another city-wide depression in 10 years. Pastner has no ties in Memphis. He was an assistant coach for one year. He is young, and a great recruiter. 'Zona could come calling once Miller leaves or fails. So, the Tomb of Doom Institute of Coach Retention has developed a blueprint for University of Memphis Athletic misDirector R.C. Johnson when negotiating Pastner's new deal. First, short-term deal. I know this seems counter-intuitive for retention, but let me explain: we sign him for 3 years, long enough to see whether or not he has what it takes. If he does, we give him a long-term extension before the third year even starts so RC's mom doesn't have to take him down to the Media Circus again. Secondly, with no head coaching experience, we should be able to get a bargain contract, somewhere in the range of $600,000. This would not be too much severance to pay if he ends up sucking. Thirdly, can we please please please get a realistic buyout clause in this contract? Few people know this, but Cal's buyout was only $200,000. He could have made that selling T-shirts of The Door on the corner of Southern and Normal. I want a buyout that will allow the city to throw a condolence party if he ever leaves... somewhere in the $4 million range. And we don't need to wait to put it in the long-term deal either, you put that junt in right now, RC.
I think this one will work Tiger fans.
-The Pistolier
Hot dang! ...Now, who is he?
Well for starters, he is Josh PASTNER, not Pasner as some news outlets and internet sites had. He is 31 years of age and was previously an assistant coach for the Tigers under John "Bluegrass" Calipari. Prior to his arrival at Memphis, he spent six years as an assistant coach under the legendary Lute Olsen at the University of Arizona, where he also played. Yeah, that's tenure under a pretty dang good ball coach and a pretty dang good used car salesman and hair stylist. He is a prolific recruiter; handling the majority of the recruiting duties at UofA and UofM and recently being named as the 7th ranked "high-major recruiter" in the country.
The only knock on Pastner, he has no head coaching experience at the college level. It's all good tho, according to DailyWildcat.com, Pastner was the head coach of the "nationally-famous" Houston Hoops AAU program... AT THE AGE OF 16! And guess who played for him... Emeka Okafor. THIS GUY COACHED EMEKA OKAFOR AT AGE 16! He is a excellent big man coach, having coached Luke Walton and Channing Frye at Arizona. Just imagine what he could have done with Joey Dorsey! And maybe, just maybe, he can talk Tag into staying. And maybe, just maybe, just maybe, current former-recruit DeMarcus Cousins will recognize his talent as a big man instructor and remain committed to Memphis. And maybe he can keep some of our assistant coaches here as well. Pastner is also expected to approach Carl Henry, father of current Tiger CJ and former Tiger signee Xavier, to serve on his staff. All of this would certainly leave the the "Big Blue" with some big ol' blue balls.
Let us now speak of retention. Pastner loves Arizona. He is quoted in the same DailyWildcat.com article as saying "I would love to come back here one day, but even if it's not coming back here in basketball terms, coming back here in the community. Tucson is my home." We could be setting ourselves up for another city-wide depression in 10 years. Pastner has no ties in Memphis. He was an assistant coach for one year. He is young, and a great recruiter. 'Zona could come calling once Miller leaves or fails. So, the Tomb of Doom Institute of Coach Retention has developed a blueprint for University of Memphis Athletic misDirector R.C. Johnson when negotiating Pastner's new deal. First, short-term deal. I know this seems counter-intuitive for retention, but let me explain: we sign him for 3 years, long enough to see whether or not he has what it takes. If he does, we give him a long-term extension before the third year even starts so RC's mom doesn't have to take him down to the Media Circus again. Secondly, with no head coaching experience, we should be able to get a bargain contract, somewhere in the range of $600,000. This would not be too much severance to pay if he ends up sucking. Thirdly, can we please please please get a realistic buyout clause in this contract? Few people know this, but Cal's buyout was only $200,000. He could have made that selling T-shirts of The Door on the corner of Southern and Normal. I want a buyout that will allow the city to throw a condolence party if he ever leaves... somewhere in the $4 million range. And we don't need to wait to put it in the long-term deal either, you put that junt in right now, RC.
I think this one will work Tiger fans.
-The Pistolier
BREAKING NEWS! PASTNER TO TIGERS! WE HAVE A COACH!
According to cbssports.com and Commercial Appeal Josh Pastner is the new head coach of the University of Memphis Tigers. Pastner was on staff with Arizona for 6 years and was an elite recruiter. He also worked under Calipari at Memphis for a short time. By the way, he is only 30! A press conference is scheduled for Tuesday. So what do you think? Brilliant hire or another R.C. gaffe?
-g
Bring Billy G! Sign the Billy Gillispie as the new Tigers Head Coach Petition!
Let's beat down the doors of the Athletic Department! The Tigers need a coach and Scott Drew has been the only feasible target of the AD! They need the fans help! Bring Billy Gillispie to Memphis! Sign this petition, which will go straight to the AD!
Billy Gillspie as the new Tigers Head Coach! Petition
Bring Billy G!
-JB
UPDATE: My apologies. I've been spelling Billy G's last name wrong. I abhor spelling errors, so I will receive public lashings every quarter hour until tomorrow for my egregious error.
The proper spelling of our future coach's name is Billy Gillispie.
Billy Gillespie (August 6, 1891 - July 2, 1981) was a football player for Sheffield United over a twenty year period from 1913-32, and scoring over 137 League and Cup goals in 492 games for the South Yorkshire side.
That's what happens when you don't look at Wikipedia closely enough.
My mistake.
Coach of the Year on the Next Tiger Coach...
Dan Wolken recently spoke to Coach of the Year, Bill Self, about his former assistant, Billy Gillespie. It was a positive endorsement.
The list of three possible coaches that was mentioned this weekend has fizzled, partly because of Scott Drew walking away (thank God). Avery Johnson has no business here, because he's never recruited and that's an essential part of being the coach at Memphis. Theus is the only name I've heard mentioned of that original three. He'd be a decent hire, but Gillespie's resume is more impressive than Reggie's. I also feel that Theus wants the spotlight, just as Cal always has. There is inherent danger in that type of person.
With every day that passes, the Tigers inch closer to obscurity. If we don't make a big hire, a lot of the national attention we'd been getting will be gone completely. Allow me to suggest...
Billy Gillespie. He is a good coach. He's turned around two programs. According to Self, he loves to recruit. There's a chance he'll bring his UK recruits with him wherever he coaches next, if he is hired this year. Why not give Billy G a chance?
I have been considering Gillespie lately, but on the heels of Self's endorsement, I've got him at the top of my list at this point. Bring on Billy G!
-JB: I do not speak for all the bloggers on the TOD in choosing to support Billy G as our new coach.
The list of three possible coaches that was mentioned this weekend has fizzled, partly because of Scott Drew walking away (thank God). Avery Johnson has no business here, because he's never recruited and that's an essential part of being the coach at Memphis. Theus is the only name I've heard mentioned of that original three. He'd be a decent hire, but Gillespie's resume is more impressive than Reggie's. I also feel that Theus wants the spotlight, just as Cal always has. There is inherent danger in that type of person.
With every day that passes, the Tigers inch closer to obscurity. If we don't make a big hire, a lot of the national attention we'd been getting will be gone completely. Allow me to suggest...
Billy Gillespie. He is a good coach. He's turned around two programs. According to Self, he loves to recruit. There's a chance he'll bring his UK recruits with him wherever he coaches next, if he is hired this year. Why not give Billy G a chance?
I have been considering Gillespie lately, but on the heels of Self's endorsement, I've got him at the top of my list at this point. Bring on Billy G!-JB: I do not speak for all the bloggers on the TOD in choosing to support Billy G as our new coach.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
i love him, i love him not, i love him, i love him not.....
Memphis' ridiculous search for a coach takes another turn. According to the Commercial Appeal Florida State's head coach Leonard Hamilton is now at the top of the list.
Who knew?! And now there is talk about Bill Gillespie. I didn't know there were trades in college basketball?
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